Many of my clients confess overwhelming guilt about their dogs.
“We got Hailey from the shelter 5 months ago” said Hailey’s owner. “She was skin and bones, scared of everything. She’s come such a long way in just a few months. I feel so bad for her. She was neglected, maybe even abused. I just hate leaving her. She needs me so.”
Hailey, a boxer pitbull mix, looked up at me from her blanket on the sofa. At her feet are a pet supply store quantity of dog toys, bones and chewsticks. Her tail thumps happily as her owner rubs her head and ears.
“Well,” she admitted “Hailey looks pretty content. Healthy, too. In fact, the vet said she could stand to lose a pound or two.”
So I told my client what I was thinking:
Hailey is a lucky, lucky dog.
We will never know what she went through before my client adopted her. And we will probably never know. And really, does it matter?
Hailey now has a warm house, a bed and a sofa, people who love her, healthy nutritious food, daily walks, toys galore, a fenced yard, superb veterinary care, her own personal trainer, naps all day in the sun, even a doggie play group twice a week. Hailey has a wonderful life!
Meanwhile, Hailey’s owner works full time so she can pay for all of Hailey’s expenses. She cleans the house, grocery shops, does the laundry, mows the lawn, cooks, replaces light bulbs and smoke alarms, does her tax return.
There is no reason for her to feel guilty about leaving Hailey alone so she can go to work and even have a semblance of a social life. Hailey will be fine.
And by the way, its not too much to ask for Hailey to sit instead of jump on people, not bark at the neighbors, and walk nicely on a leash. Her owner is not preventing her from doing the things that dogs do by asking her to be polite. A well-mannered dog is a pretty fair exchange for the privilege of a cushy life.
If you are feeling guilty about your dog – and who wouldn’t when you see that face looking so forlorn as you put your coat on to leave – remember all the things you do for your dog every single day, smile and walk out the door. Don’t worry. He will be really happy to see you when you come home.
