Or maybe it should be “Bite, interrupted.” Because some dogs will take the briefest of nips and back away so quickly that you’re not sure it really happened. Even the so-called victim might be unaware of the damage, if any, that may have occurred.
Here is how such an incident might play out in a court of law.
COOPER –VS-THE NEIGHBORHOOD CHILD
SCENE: The setting is a courtroom. The plaintiffs are the parents of a 5-year-old girl.
The defendant is Cooper, a neutered male 2 year old Boxer. The Bailiff enters the courtroom and calls the case of Cooper versus the Neighborhood Child. The child’s parents are seated with their attorney at the plaintiff’s table, Cooper with his counsel at the defendant’s table.
JUDGE: This is the case of Cooper versus the Neighborhood Child. As I understand the pleadings, the charge against Cooper is a bite or attempted bite against the Child. Now, are there any opening statements?
ATTORNEY FOR CHILD: Your honor, in this case, we will show that last May 19, the defendant, Cooper, did indeed attempt to nip the plaintiff. We will show that he willfully and intentionally barked at and nipped the Child, and furthermore, that he had been planning to do so for many months before the incident.
JUDGE: Does the attorney for Cooper have any opening statement?
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Your honor, the plaintiff’s charge is unfounded. We will show that the defendant had been tortured and teased by the plaintiff for a very long time. The defendant warned the plaintiff time and time again to stop, yet she continued to antagonize him. My client had no recourse but to escalate the warning.
JUDGE: Very well, call your first witness.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: I call Cooper as my first witness.
JUDGE: (Cooper gets up, goes forward to be sworn in.) Please raise your right paw. (Cooper does so.) Do you swear that the evidence you are about to give is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
COOPER: I do.
JUDGE: Please be seated.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Please state your name.
COOPER: My name is Cooper.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Where do you live?
COOPER: I live in a house with some humans. The yard is okay except for the part that makes that beeping sound when I get too close to where the zap is.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: So your yard has an invisible fence.
COOPER: Is that what that is? You’re right, I can’t see it. I guess everyone else can, though, because lots of humans walk in and out of my yard. Squirrels, too. Sometimes Sassy, the setter from next door, does. That’s fun.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Ah, yes. Well, let’s move on to the afternoon of May 19, 2009. Do you recall your whereabouts on that morning?
COOPER: I was in my yard. The little humans were getting off the big noisy moving thing. That Neighborhood Child, the one sitting over there, she came over to my yard and screamed at me. She does it every single day. She has the highest shriek. Hey! Maybe no one can hear her except me. But boy, can I hear it!
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Cooper, let me understand this. The Neighborhood Child comes to your yard every day, and screams at you. Is that correct?
COOPER: Yes.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: So, it’s kind of like when a faucet drips and drips and drips until finally you can’t stand it and you call a plumber. And in this instance, you called the plumber. Is that right?
COOPER: Yeah, what you said.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Did you let the Neighborhood Child know that you didn’t like the screaming?
COOPER: You bet! I barked and barked at her every time she came to my yard. The last couple of times, I growled at her. She didn’t get my drift though. She didn’t belong there and she was a pain in the you-know-what, too.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Did the Neighborhood Child’s parents do anything about it? Did your owners do anything about it?
COOPER: Nope. No one did a thing. So I did.
ATTORNEY FOR COOPER: Judge, I rest my case. I believe the Defendant was provoked repeatedly by the Plaintiff. Despite repeatedly warning the Neighborhood Child, the Defendant had no recourse but to take matters into his own paws.
JUDGE: I am ready to give my decision. I find the defendant: not guilty. Cooper had done all he could to get the Neighborhood Child to cease and desist. In Cooper’s mind, the girl had ignored the warning again and again.
However, there are two other parties in this case who are guilty:
The Neighborhood Child’s parents are guilty, for not supervising their child adequately and not educating her about dog safety.
Cooper’s owners are guilty, for not seeing that their dog’s stress level was reaching the breaking point, and for not getting some training for him to prevent an incident like this from happening.
Court adjourned.