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21 Uses for a Couch (Round Two)

Welsh Terrier Charlie has a couch.


It is his couch.

When his owners adopted Charlie and brought him home, they were in agreement that the dog was absolutely not allowed on the furniture.

The first evening, they sat on the floor with Charlie and watched TV together.

The second evening, Charlie was allowed on the couch “just this once” because his owners had received their Netflix copy of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, and 166 minutes was way too long for them to sit on the floor.

After that, Charlie always seemed to find his way up on the couch. His owners didn’t insist that he get down because he was awfully cute and cuddly.

Eventually, Charlie would get on the couch and his owners would have to move him over to claim an inch or two of space for themselves. Charlie would always lay perpendicular and in sleep, relax into a sprawl that pretty much took up the whole seat cushion.

Charlie is a creative guy, devising multiple ways to keep the couch fresh, meaningful, and HIS. Here are Charlie’s 21 uses for his couch:

1. Downward Yoga Pose – lay on back with head drooping over the side

2. High Alert – perch on the back cushion and scan for intruders

3. Dig for Gold – crumbs in between the seat cushions


4. Dig for Silver – the foam in the cushions

5. Dig for the Heck of It – create a nest using toenails

6. Giddyap – straddle the arm


7. Extraneous Fabric – discard the arm covers

8. Coffee Table – bring kibble on couch for comfy dining

9. Ramparts – stand tall and search for the cat

10. Moat – leap to the ottoman and back to the couch; repeat

11. Drawbridge – rear feet on the ottoman, front feet on the couch

12. Spa Treatment – flop and roll

13. Cloak of Invisibility – dive under the afghan

14. Atonement – front paws on the seat, look pitiful

15. Roth IRA – deposit toys one by one on the seat


16. Gravy Stain – sniff and lick until well moistened

17. Get a Room – contort body and swab privates

18. Neck Wrap – drape body over human shoulders

19. Foot Massage – knead paws into human thighs

20. Lint Brush – rub and shed generously

21. Warning Labelgrowl to discourage human use

Before your dog stakes out the couch as his and his alone, train him to go to his bed or place, and only allow him up if you invite him.

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